Maybe I Need to Quit Waiting.........

The temporary housing that my wife and I are living in is rather quiet this morning. She is over at church facilitating what she facilitates for a "ladies Bible class." She laughs and says that her job there is "herding cats." I'm not sure that the elderly women, most older than her, would call themselves cats, but I'm reasonably sure that they would chuckle because of their love and fondness for her. 

In the quiet, I have read a few pages from a new acquaintance, David Lamotte, singer, songwriter, book writer, musician, and speaker. Here is his page. I'm eager to buy his book and read it, maybe again and again. His Ted Talks are pretty amazing. I'd recommend that you check them out. 

One of his life experiences and reflections upon it stopped me in my tracks. 

And it dawned on me. 

I have been waiting too long to live the rest of my life, the best of my life. 

I have been waiting for my body to be cancer-free. 

I have been waiting for the State Farm adjuster to get off of his a** and get things going so that water damage in our house can be repaired and my wife and I can get back to where we started back in August. Yes, if you read a previous post here on this blog, you'll know that we have been at this madness since August 26, and today is January 29. We've been stuck now for five months whereas it all could have been done and over with at the three month mark, or perhaps earlier. 

That lengthy paragraph illustrates the point that I am making. I have been waiting for the State Farm adjuster to get off of his lazy a** and get things moving. 

It's easy to get stuck in a rut, especially when the rut is not of your choosing. Ruts can make victims of all of us. 

This morning one of those moments happened that was indeed a moment of grace on a cold and rainy day. 

I first met Gary Grant, president of the Black Farmers and Agriculturalists Association back in 2005. At that time, I was weary of directing the MFT program at Abilene Christian University. A normal tenure of a chair, or program director was two years, but due to a number of things beyoung our control happened and my tenure lasted close to ten years. A doctoral level associate was ready to take over the reins and I wanted to get out of her way so she could have a fresh start without me onsite. 

I'd been working some with Black farmers and decided that a faculty renewal grant and a semester's absense would be good for her, the program, and me. The faculty committee gave me a sizeable grant so I could travel the South and Midwest and interview Black farmers. First, though, I had to connect with a person who could open doors for me. That person was Gary Grant. 

It was a humbling thing to be tutored by Gary. I swallowed my pride several times as he "coached me up." Thanks to him and to the Vice President of BFAA, Dr. Ridgley Muhammad, in Dawson, GA, I was able to interview many farmers and families. Those interviews are transcribed and in Tillery's Historical Archives in Tillery, NC. 

Since then, our paths have taken numerous directions, and my wife and I love Gary and his family very much. 

Then, in 2019 as Shoun Hill and I were in the process of interviewing and filming for the documentary, our paths took us to Silver Spring, MD and the former director of the Office of Civil Rights at USDA, Lloyd Wright, a gentleman that I'd seen in August, 1997, at a mediation for a Black farmer. From there, we made our way to NJ and to the home of Lawrence Lucas, president emeritus of the USDA Coalition of Minority Employees. Our interview with Lawrence lasted some five hours as he was full of information and perspectives, all of which captivated me and all of which is on video tape as we speak. You'll see photos and a brief bio of both Lloyd and Lawrence as well as the Grant family on the web page for the film. 

And this morning, we all three connected, Lawrence from NJ, Gary from NC, and me from TX. It dawned on me that I was in the presence via the magic of iPhones and three-way calling of a rare opportunity, a moment of grace. I was in the midst of a conversation with two legends in the Black Farmer Movement. I was in the presence of greatness. That is my attribution, not theirs as they are more humble than that. 

Lawrence and I both entered the movement in different ways in 1994, him in DC and me in Texas. He as an advocate and me as a hired consultant for Black farmers cases that were being mediated before USDA and DOJ. I've written that story a couple of times in these pages. I owe James Myart a lot. This link has some of how his story and mine intertwined. 

Gary had entered the movement much, much earlier. His father was a Black farmer. He knew what the challenges were. He saw racism face to face and it was ugly. He and his sister and her son speak of some of these things in the documentary. He had fought tenaciously to hold on to his parents' land for decades and they have succeeded in doing so, honoring his father's request not to let anybody, especially the USDA get his land. The land is still in the family. 

But this morning, three long time friends were on the phone. We talked, laughed, asked and answered questions as to our health, families, and the state of affairs in our country. The conversation lasted an hour. It was intense at times as we discussed the political climate and what we have to face and endure over the next four years, or longer. 

The Movement is important to the three of us. Fairness, equity, and addressing racism and racist policies at USDA runs through our veins. And what makes these men so amazing at what they do, among other things, is their mutual ability to be inclusive in their thinking and actions. They are not jealous of others' involvement. I am living proof of that. For twenty years I have been included in the justice work that involves Gary Grant. For some six years, I have been connected in the justice work of Lawrence Lucas. My life will never be the same again, no matter who long I live. 

At times, many times, during the course of that hour, I simply said nothing and listened. I listened to two of my heroes in the Movement. I didn't have to stay quiet, and I really didn't for long, because these are friends as well as legends. They at different times and different places opened doors for me to walk through as an advocate and participant in the movement. They are the heroes and the legends of the Movement. I sensed that I was in the midst of greatness. 

And so I listened to their discussion, and how they disagreed without being disagreeable. I listened to their mutual fondness for each other and for me, and mine for them. I listened and tried to absorb the beauty of the moment as long-time friends sparred and laughed with and for each other. I listened as they grasped the fact that they were toward the end of their lives, both in their 80s, and me in my 70s, but the DNA of justice still shaped and informed their bodies, minds, and spirits. 

I wanted to memorialize this conversation this morning because none of us know how many more of these moments we will have. We don't know how much longer we'll have the strength to speak truth to power inside the Beltway and beyond. As I quipped to them, "We are the aging of America," and they agreed. 

We have more to do especially during this crucial time with a new president who seems to be more powerful than the last time, as he gathers his loyalists around him, all of whom empower him further. We will be dealing with a new USDA secretary. It looks like she'll be the woman who graduated from A&M who grew up in small town Glen Rose, Texas. 

Each day is a blessing and a gift. Being in one's "right mind" in each day is a gift. It's obvious that we are never promised more than we have at the moment. 

In the words of Mary Oliver in her beautiful poem, "Poem 133: The Summer Day," and her last line, "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your wild and precious life?"

Gary, Lawrence, and Waymon are doing what we have planned to do our wild and precious lives.

And today I get to do my life in the company of Gary Grant and Lawrence Lucas, and, yes, just maybe I'm tired of waiting. 

Last Week, the Longest Year of My Life

The title to this post came from a Facebook friend's page. At first, I simply chuckled, and, then, I pondered it a little while and came to align with her. It has indeed been a very odd and strange week, the first week of a new administration. 

Who did you think we were going to get as a newly installed president in his second non-consecutive term? Is he doing the things you had hoped he would do when you pressed the button on the voting machine? Or, is he behaving differely? Worse? Better? 

Those last questions may merit some parsing. If we are what we eat, then, are we also who we vote for? This opinion will offend some, but my  own answer is "I think so." If the current president won by some small percentage, and if the third party voters added 1.06% to the mix, then he got a small number of Americans to align with him. At the same time, he garnered the support of white, conservative, evangelicals, and not a small number who are not well educated. I ponder then and think about my family and friends, how could they vote for him, twice impeached, stirred up an insurrection, raped a woman and has to pay a ton of money to her for that event and for her disparagement of her, lied and knew he was lying about the stolen election, demands loyalty or you'll experience the wrath of his revenge, a convicted felon, one who pardons criminals who killed people or maimed people and spread feces on the walls of one of the People's buildings as he watched, a serial adulterer, and the list can go on and on and on and on.

If that guy is president, am I in some way reflected in what and who he is? 

I think so. 

Look at what he is doing now that he's in office. Those values continue unabated. Deporting millions of people, vowing to make groceries and gas cheaper, nominated some wealthy and lacking in character people for key positions (think Hudspeth and you've got it narrowed down quickly), closing NIH and research down for some undetermined time, ceasing economic support to our neighbors around the world for 90 days, and the list goes on and on. I supposed that some things you expected, if you voted for him, and I suspect that he is doing some things that you did not know he would do. 

All that he is doing is consistent with his character, or lack thereof. And all that he is doing is consistent with you, the people who voted for him. 

At least we don't have Kamala Harris as president as one of my long time friends wrote this morning. I find that comment both curious and disturbing. 

A while back, I asked my friends on Facebook to tell me back-channel, not for public viewing or commenting, how their theology informed who they would vote for, Harris/Walz or Trump/Vance. Know how many independents/democrats informed me? Somewhere close to ten, give or take. Know how many republicans informed me? Zero. None. Zilch. That caused me to stop and think as to why none would comment. I know some. I know a lot of them. They pick on me on FB. They are family and they are friends, long term and short term. Maybe I am not trustworthy with their opinions. Maybe they didn't have the time to comment. Maybe they simply didn't care to comment. Or, maybe, just maybe, they do not have a theology that informs their voting habits or voting in this election. 

Either direction, I thought that was pretty telling. 

This isn't the time nor the place, but choosing Trump over Harris is pretty indicting within and of itself. I am like a lot of researchers around the country. America would rather have a guy who fits the description up in that long paragraph rather than a Black woman. We've already had one Black president and that was enough. Yes, we are sexist and we are racist. Only white men need apply. 

Kamala Harris grew up in a historically Black Baptist church along with an unnamed temple. I suspect that she reads her Bible, and that she prays, and that she ponders the connections between her spiritual values and her political views. I'm not so sure about President Trump. I suspect that his faith and his politics are safely boxed up in separated boxes, some of which he may not even know. 

As an aside, I appreciate what the United Methodist Church did.  They developed and then released their theology of voting. Vote for the common good. That's what I did. I did not vote for Trump because I know what he did to the Office of Civil Rights during his first term. He dismantled it the way Reagan did in 1983. A dismantled OASCR is impotent in pursuing and mediating complaints of discrimination against Black farmers by white officials at the county level. That's just one illustration. 

The most disturbing event of the week was the church service last Tuesday morning. At the end of her sermon, she gently and respectfully requested that President Trump have mercy on the people in our country who are scared now. And, sad to say, they have every right to be scared. To be scared makes sense. It is wise. It just may protect someone from further harm. Here is that sermon. I thought it was brilliant. The nonverbals of President Trump and Vice President Vance are pretty telling. 

Later, President Trump on his page on Truth Social issues a scathing rebuke of her and her sermon and demanded an apology. I'll not put his vitriolic page up here on my page. However, you can read about it here at this URL. Or, a simple google search will give you more information than you want. 

I would like a president who has reasonable policies. I do not want a president who is mean-spirited, who has thin skin and who will respond with venom against anyone perceived to be his enemy. I do not want a vengeful president, one who will wreak havoc on those who disagree with him. I do not want a president who denies the seriousness of J6, plans to indict the members of the J6 committee, and has now exonerated those who committed violence and murder and lesser offenses. They surely feel justified and Trump has released them on America. 

I understand that empathy is not being disparaged as an opponent of truth. Where did it enter our public vernacular that one cannot be truthful and empathic at the same time. That makes me scratch my head more than once. 

So, yes, this week has indeed been the longest year of my life. I suspect that is the case for some of us, but not for all of us. I suspect that for some of us, we are glorying at the events. If I am suspicious of Trump's character and motives, and if you support him without question, then I feel morally obligated to observe the fruit of your life.

And, what will next week bring? Another year of our lives? 

Let Justice Ring: I Want America to Be Good For You

Let Justice Ring: I Want America to Be Good For You: As folks who follow me know, I've been in and out of the hospital, ER, medical clinics, and other ancillary offices related to medicine....

On This Day Filled with Many Ironies, Here are My Thoughts

I pretty much anticipated today. Though sleep was deep and healing last night, I knew what this day would bring. I'm no prophet, but my instincts were correct. 

On the one hand is a crowd of some size gathering in various places to be near him as he is sworn in. They wear their predictable regalia. They say predictable things. And if the cameras are on them and an interviewer stands before them, their answers will chill our bones. Yes, we've seen it before. 

On the other hand, this is a federally recognized holiday for one of America's most significant leaders. MLK Day means different things to different people. For most white churches, it's just another day and the offices will be open and the pulpits will be silent. For many in professional settings, offices will be open, the employees are not given a day off, and the doctors are plying their trade. Restaurants will be open, people need to eat, and servers need to earn their minimal salaries and earn the tips. 

Like many of you, I have read Dr. King's speeches, listened to his soaring rhetorical style, and even visited some places where he trod. The Pettus Bridge in Selma, Alabama was chilling, to walk where the protestors including Dr. King walked, got beaten, and where the blood ran. With my wife and a good friend, we visited Sweet Auburn, noting that several years prior, we could not have walked that area together. We walked into Ebenezer Baptist Church and observed the pulpit from which Dr. King preached. We encouraged our friend to stand where he stood. Reluctantly he did. It was a treasured moment. 

We lived in Memphis in the early to mid-70s and then the late '70s into the early '80s, and our home was not far from where the horrendous event occurred with the trash truck crushing the workers. We walked the streets where the shot rang out that startled America and showed us who we were. 

Dr. King understood the plight of the Black farmer. This one brief film captures his understanding. My friends and I remember the four years of Trump's first time in the oval office. We recall his erratic style of leadership and his appointment of various people who would do his bidding. We recall Sonny Perdue in particular. We remember that Trump and Perdue dismantled portions of the Office of Civil Rights, much like Reagan did back in the '80s. We know that many complaints of discrimination simply were tossed aside, much like former Secretary of Agriculture, Mike Espy, recalled in our interview with him for the documentary about Black farmers versus USDA. 

No, I am not thrilled that Trump was re-elected. I hoped better for America. We deliberately stayed home and did not vote, or went to the polls and voted for a convicted criminal to the highest position in America. We voted our values, including our racist and sexist values, and the most qualified person, a woman, a Black woman, a Black, qualified woman, will do something else for the next four years rather than lead our country. 

While on the one hand we are not pleased with what the Democratic administrations have done or not done on behalf of Black farmers. We've written much about that on these pages. Just hit the key words in the search bar and you can read them. We are not at all pleased with what Trump's previous administration did during and after his presidency. Again, Miller's shenanigans are recorded on these pages as well. 

So, while I am torn on this day, an inauguration that I do not support and a federal holiday in honor of Dr. King, I commit myself to work with my friends on behalf of Black farmers of our country. Yes, we are parts of the larger "Black Farmer Movement," and we will protest, write, speak, research, film, and all manner of other things on behalf of a marginalized farmer group of our country. 

We will strategize. We will research. We will know a lot about who is in the secretary's office in that monolitic USDA office building in Washington, DC. We will connect with her, ask for meetings, demand change at the county level, the source and origins of many problems of Black land loss. 

We will not stop just because a new administration is in place. We will work that much harder. There will be a different philosophy permeating the halls of office buildings, ag office buildings in our states across the US, and in meetings of the county committees in those states. 

We will demand change. We know what got us here. We also know what will destroy us if we let it. Until every breath is gone from our bodies, we will work on behalf of what is of ultimate value to us. 

So, on this day of multiple ironies, these thoughts of mine are now placed here for your viewing and consideration. 

Battling Institutions of Power and Privilege: Major Medical and State Farm

Since June, 2019, my wife and I have been engaged in "battles" with several institutions of power and privilege. We have been engaged with the worlds of medicine, pharmacology, hospitals, major medical insurance, and home owners insurance. 

We have appreciated this engagement with varying degrees of appreciation and satisfaction. 

My wife wisely sorted through options and enrolled us in Medicare prior to moving home to Texas. Medicare is primary and AARP supplements are secondary. Part D covers medications. Her leadership has been a blessing. 

Insurance is a huge deal in our world. If you have it, you are blessed, and if you don't, you're in trouble. Some of you have followed my health care journey on this platform or on Facebook. Either one, you've read some rather dramatic things about my health, hospitalizations, and medications. Those have at time been frightening, painful, and costly. 

As an aside before going further, I believe that all of this is about justice. In our society, I think it is wrong for some to have everything covered and for others to live without insurance or to die without insurance and the medical care that it covers. A young man I met several months back told me about the story of his father, a pastor without insurance suffering from the deadly condition of diabetes, and now he is going blind. That grieves my soul, very, very deeply. 

There are many structures in our world. Structures are insulated and have rules for their existence. Those structures of power and privilege are inhabited by people who sustain that power and who decide who benefits from the structure. 

I have had the best of medicare care from my physicians here in my home town to my medical care team with University of Texas Southwestern. I have had the best of the provision of medicines from the  Refill Center affiliated with the Chickasaw Nation, Walgreens, and the pharmacy at the hospital in Dallas. I have had the best of care inside hospitals affiliated with UT Southwestern and here in my hometown as well. 

I have had the best of medical insurance. Putting those packages together, my wife and I have paid $0.00 for prescriptions. My cancer meds are very expensive, and that zeroes out. What my insurance companies don't cover, a grant from UTSW covers. A monthly supply is zeroed out. I owe nothing on very, very expensive drugs. 

I am clearly a person of privilege in the medical, hospital, pharmaceutical, and major medical insurance worlds. I did not "earn" that privilege but am the beneficiary of that privilege by nature of a chain of events and a conglomeration of events. I do not take that privilege for granted. 

On the other hand, my wife and I have been engaged with another monolitic entity, home owners insurance purchased from State Farm. We have had State Farm insurance for years, as far back as we can remember. We do the bundle thing where everything is covered from home to automobiles. 

It has become clear to us that my wife and I have no "privilege" with State Farm. Despite the fact that we are long time customers of State Farm, we are indeed secondary to the monolithic system called State Farm insurance. It has also become clear in dealing with our assigned State Farm adjuster that State Farm is his "customer" and we are not. 

Back in August, we awakened to a river of water that inundated our kitchen, breakfast area, most of our living room, hallway, utility room, pantry, two bedrooms, one bathroom, and one closet. It flowed beaneath some fairly expensive kitchen cabinets, utitility room cabinets, and bathroom cabinets. It destroyed priceless comic books, which insurance did cover partially. 

The company that dried the floors came immediately, set up over the course of nine days 39 heaters and blowers that eventually dried it out. The adjuster said that many were not necessary, despite the fact the he is not the expert on that, but the young man who did the work is the expert. Thus, he approved only 1/2 of that company's charges. This began an intolerable process three or four days after the deluge. 

When it was time to hire a "pack out" company, the State Farm adjuster brought in his own preferred provider, and we brought in two providers who had been highly recommended to us. One was a low bid and one that was a high bid. State Farm's? It was low but it set the bar for what the adjuster would approve. The label for that guy, a guy our team had met before? The title was "the Walmart of packers." I saw the manipulation from the start. Let the manipulation and low-balling begin.

The adjuster argued with the company that packed us out despite telling him to go ahead and pack us out. We're here in January, and the pack out will be completed today. The leaders of th pack out company saw how the adjuster was treating us and actually came onsite a time or two to level the playing field. 

The adjuster for State Farm did a "quick and dirty" review of the damage, minimal at best, three days after the deluge occurred. Once we saw how the State Farm adjuster was operating, we hired our own public adjuster to represent us and to attempt to mediate the differences. When the public adjuster and the State Farm adjuster finally met at our house, approximately four months after this nonsense started, mediation began and the State Farm adjuster actually spent more time then than he did at the beginning of the process. 

You may wonder what was the need for a public adjuster? It was simple. The State Farm adjuster was willing to cover 1/2 of the charges that were to be incurred. We saw how hard they worked and the measures they took to take care of our belongings. State Farm's payment early on was 1/2 of the reasonable charges of the water mitigation and the pack-out, and ultimately the same would be for the renovation.

By this time we were weary of the low-balling of the State Farm adjuster and hired our own public adjuster. The difference between our adjuster's estimate and that of State Farm was enormous. 

Eventually things began to thaw a bit. We don't know exactly why. Was it because we hired a competent public adjuster? Was it because Charla challenged the State Farm adjuster and his low-balling, disrespectful, demeaning/sexist treatment of her? Was it because our State Farm agent contacted him on our behalf? Was it because of the scathing letter from my oncologist who nailed him for his treating me/us that made treatment for cancer even more complicated? 

We are now in our second temporary house. Curious that State Farm did not release sufficient funds to fix our house, but they will pay a ton of money for temporary housing and storage of our belongings. Figure that one out. 

I've researched State Farm and its reputation for these sorts of things, and its reputation is quite sketchy. It is known as the company who pays the least after the longest period of time. I think the company's philosophy is wear them out and then they'll settle. 

That said, it is clear that the State Farm adjuster has one customer. It is not us. It is the entity of power and privilege, State Farm, the very wealthy insurance company. 

At the end of day, I am proud of the way my wife has handled all of this nonsense. I regret being in a position that I had to take care of my cancer treatment and was nothing more than a back channel supporter for her. 

We followed the rules based on the game plan lined out by State Farm. State Farm failed us at the adjuster level. They failed us at the cover our expenses of renovating the house level. Despite what our coverage says, the State Farm adjuster has a rationale that is going to try to put something in but not equal to what we have now. 

We are now going to arbitration because our public adjuster and the State Farm adjuster do not agree. The arbitration process may or may not work. I'm not optimistic. 

The State Farm property claim process should be easier. A public adjuster should not have to be hired if the State Farm guy does his job. In this case, he failed miserably. 

State Farm is reputedly  one of the best in the nation; however, one set of evaluations says otherwise. On a 5.0 scale, the rating was overall performance was 3.8. The rating made by users was lower. It was a 3.1. AM Best rates it at a A++. My wife and I will undoubtedly fall in the lower ratings by users. 

Bottom line, what are our complaints? What have we found that is unjust in terms of their treatment of long term loyal customers? 

1) Incompetent State Farm adjuster; 

2) Failure of the State Farm adjuster to evaluate the house quickly and thoroughly;

3) Failure of the State Farm adjuster to collaborate with entities we hired (water, pack-outs, renovation);

4) Failure of State Farm to move swiftly in getting the Hinsons back in their home; 

5) Failure to negotiate in good faith such that we hired the public adjuster to represent us and our interests; 

6) Failure of the State Farm adjuster and the system to negotiate in good faith such that we now have to hire arbritators; and

6) Failure of the State Farm adjuster to honor the insurance policy. 

There may be more. 

I am tagging two offices of state farm.

1.) For payments: 

State Farm Insurance Companies

Insurance Support Center -- East

P.O. Box 588002

North Metro, GA 30029

2.) Headquarters: 

State Farm Insurance Headquarters

Bloomington, IL 

3.) Claims

Auto/Home/Property Claims

800-SF-CLAIM (800-732-5246)

The irony is that we were treated fairly and justly in the narrative of the first few paragraphs by the medical community and insurance. As I near the end of cancer treatment, we are deeply grateful for the medical care that I received and the ease with which providers were paid. 

In the later few paragraphs, we, apparently are in the same boat as a lot of people across Americak. We are being treated unfairly. I think the shenanigans by State Farm's employee hampered my cancer treatment. Apparently so does my medical team.